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Is infidelity becoming the new normal?


If you have not already came across it, Netflix added a new series to their t.v. line-up called Friends from college. The story line sets around six friends who haven’t seen each other in years and come back together after attending Harvard together 20 years ago. Immediately you learn that two of the main characters who are both married are involved in an affair that has been taking place for the last 20 years. There are a few things wrong with this picture to me. My first initial though was who has an affair for 20 years and their partner never suspects anything? My second question was why are they even married to their significant others in the first place?

It makes you think about this uprising glorification of side chicks/guys. All too often it is displayed in movies that individuals are participating in affairs with no regard for their significant others. I mean, it is one thing have an affair one time but to continue it for years is just plain disrespectful. To add insult to injury you happen to be friends with the person assisting your partner in the infidelity. How many times have we seen cases where the person knew the individual their partner was having an affair with and I do not just mean knew of them.

These days the girl sitting across from you at a birthday party and or the guy you play 2K with everyday might be smashing your partner and you don’t even know it. What makes it worse is they have a relationship with you to the point where you are comfortable opening about your relationship to the same person whose ruining it.  The part that baffled me the most was the need to maintain their secret out of respect for their partners feelings. The irony in itself is mind blowing. You do not want to tell the truth out of fear of hurting feelings but you continue to participate in the act that ultimately will hurt their feelings.

We use excuses like, “well they make me laugh.”, “I cannot help it when I get around them”, “they do what my man/girl won’t do”, “he/she works all the time and I was lonely”, and my favorite, “well maybe if you had done……” All the while the same effort that is put into the affair is not being put back into your relationship. At the end of the day I would rather leave you than to cheat on you. Number one, I don’t have the energy nor the time to be constantly explaining my random trips, late night calls, or the random times my phone goes to vm during the day. Number two, I barely want to deal with my own feelings and now I have two sets of feelings to juggle. Number three, if I get caught I may end up with neither one and then I wasted all this work for nothing.

One day my son will come to me and he may want some advice on females and I be damned if I am going to advise him to juggle multiple females at the same time. When did we start teaching people that disrespect was normal? I know people will say that people been cheating for years and years way before my generation came along but does that make it ok? People have been discriminating against others for their differences for years does that make that ok? NO!  Why must I constantly see infidelity on t.v. shows? Where are the good examples? Do those not get good enough ratings to be put on television? What are we teaching people? Let me guess! Was their affair OK because deep down they were both in love with each other and realized too late that they had married the wrong people? If you ask me, love or no love the whole situation was screwed up.

I want my son to respect women and that goes further than pulling out a chair and not calling her out of her name. Respect must be given spiritually, mentally, physically, and sexually. Sleeping outside of your relationship is disrespectful in the fact that it puts your partner at risk. It is emotionally damaging and shows blatant disregard for the person that you are with. When are we going to stop making it OK for shows like the new VH1 Side Chicks show that will be airing soon? By time my son is old enough to date monogamy might be a thing of the past. I really hope that is not the road we are headed down.

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